Cigarettes and Valentines
by Viridian Valentine
Summary: As the saying goes, "keep your friends close, and your enemies closer."


This can't be goodbye, it can't be the end.

Everything falls into an endless black abyss as our memories collide, causing a sweet but tragic longing for what could never been there at all.

Loveless, careless, heartless.

Nothing left but a thought, a wondering, if the impossible was overcome.

We trusted, decieved, screamed at, and pushed each other away... but we still came back.

The silent torture rips all of that apart as the truth is revealed, bringing with it fatal outcomes.

Was any of this real?

Or was it just a one-sided game that was taken so far that fantasy became reality?

Maybe, just maybe, all of us are in this twisted game of transparent hope and comfort that takes our souls away piece by piece.

The shadows are always near us, ready to swoop in and swipe us away when we let our guards down.

Everything could be an enemy to us, even each other.

Being purposely shut out from the rest of the world, I finally opened up and shared my trust.

Was it then that my thoughts were obscured?

Not very likely.

But my motives were now clear, although i didn't understand why: I just had to get closer to you.

But now... a farewell?

I won't allow myself to believe it.

After all the trouble to get where we are now, giving it up now would be like I never even cared at all.

Promises, not all of them can be kept.

But the return will give a haunting comfort; this time will be different.

I'll take a risk and put myself on the line to show you what i've been so nervous and hesitant to reveal.

Just trying to knock some sense into this monster that can be such an innocent doll.

But do essences still linger in the thoughts of those not around?

Are they forgotten, or remembered so much that it causes an entire chain of internal commotion?

To check back and see if that return came, eventually becoming habitual.

But no, not a single assurance.

The only thing is to dream and hope, holding on to what has been believed.

So i'll put myself out in the open for now, spilling the recent conflict taking over me.

Then i'll hide myself away, locking myself up so that nothing can get through, until that day of our fated reunion.

Nothing left but a striking pain and bliss.

* * *

People say that high school sweethearts are nothing more than a mere work of fiction, that such a thing couldn't truly exist in this world of ours.

But we knew differently. We knew that no matter what circumstance was thrown at us, no matter what distance separated or stuck us together, we were in it because of fate, whether it was wanted or not. Sure, we could lie to ourselves. There were always some points along that winding road where we doubted the entire existence of our bond, even reaching the point of loathing each other. That doesn't mean that we ever accepted it. For moments, even long periods of time, sometimes we did. As the saying goes however, "resistance is futile."

Connections don't always have to be direct, but if you make an impression on someone just for even a second, just with maybe a mere glance or acknowledgement that they exist in the same plane as yourself, it impacts and alters both of your lives forever. Whether things move on from that one point and continue to breed, continue to evolve into something else, is entirely up to you. It didn't matter what emotion brought us together. When you think about it, "high school sweethearts" doesn't just apply to emotions concerning love.

Sweethearts in anger, in sadness, in loneliness, jealousy, admiration...either way the initial connection was formed, it's still a connection.

So what were we? Were we truly initally thrown together in the lovers quadrant, or did it happen due to curiosity, a subconscious realization of what the other had to offer and the irresistible urge to be involved in the danger?

I suppose it's a little of both, wouldn't you agree? I sure do now.

After all.  
They can draw the first blood, but you also have that choice in front of you.

Both sides should be aware of just how literal that can get.


End file.
